The Mentally Unstable Need Not Apply (Unless They Fake Sanity Really Well)

I'm sick of creating titles that fit with I Would Rather Sleep Forever... There are only so many. So I'm done with that.

That guy Chris, the one whose every breath annoys me to the point of homicidal curiousity, is finally gone. Or so it appears. More than 48 hours without so much as a ten word text, and I'm almost jumping for joy. I just worry that the second I start to celebrate his departure, he'll show. Friday afternoon, at about 1:30, I look out the window at work to see a guy walking up the path towards the automatic doors. Not exactly a rare sight, it is a public place that encourages people to frequent the premises. It wouldn't have warranted more than a split second glance if the guy hadn't been the spitting image of Chris. Same height, same build, same blond highlighted backstreet boy wannabe haircut. He came to the front desk, about 20 feet from where I was standing, and I almost hid. Instead I stood there like a moron, pretending to be doing something while actually attempting to covertly look at him every tenth of a second. Thankfully it wasn't him, but I think I had a mild heart attack. I've had exs go psycho stalker on me before (including one who phoned in a fake hostage situation that made for a very humiliating night with my parents and two cops) so I think my freakout threshold is substantially lower than the average persons.

So now I'm on the hunt again...and it really does feel like hunting since I've gotten more aggressive in the last year. I hate games. A friend of a friend started poking me on facebook, someone I don't talk to very often, but he's cute. It went on for days, poke, poke, poke, poke. Finally I sent him a message and all I got back was more ambiguous crap. I wasn't going to sit around waiting for him to ask me out after his balls finally drop, so I asked him what the deal was. Long story short, his status changed to "in a relationship" a couple of days ago, and I'm not dating him. It's all for the best though, since I've heard he has super sperm and the last thing I need to be is with child.

So I'm single and looking, and like the title says, the mentally unstable need not apply. I'm unstable enough for two.

I Would Rather Sleep Forever...